Friday, August 25, 2006

The Double "E"

My brain is constantly filled with a mixed bag of silly stuff. I've been spending my whole life trying to rewire the way I think about things. I'm still doing it. I've always been a happy junkie, and can't imagine why anyone wouldn't want to spend as many moments as possible feeling good. My journey has taught me that joy comes at a price. A constant state of elation appears to be impossible. Such a bummer! It also seems that periods of bliss only happen by doing other things that aren't so blissful while doing them. On top of that, falling into the short-term-short-cuts-trap is a total disaster. Damn, life is tricky! Do you see what I mean when I say that my brain is filled with silliness?

I hate feeling sad and depressed because it makes me feel so sad and depressed. But today, I feel really good. Kind of freaky good, and I'm not really sure why. My body bashing crazy Sunday workout was a monster this morning, and it should have knocked me for a loop. For some reason I have this hopeful happy feeling (weird but cool) that's causing goose bumps. You know the feeling. The sky is bright blue and the temp is 72, and there's a very light breeze coming in my back door. It appears that ideal atmospherical surroundings seem to help. My energy is up and so is my enthusiasm as I sit here and write. I usually forget to recognize these moments, but not today.

The Two E's (Energy and Enthusiasm) control my brain and rule my life. Some days organizing a sock drawer feels like climbing Mt. Everest. My buddy Ed will say I'm "double-o-g" (out of gas). When I'm runnin on fumes, sometimes it's my fault, (poor food choices and not enough sleep) and other times it's out of my control. Maybe the answer is choosing right over wrong more often, combined with letting go. Why in the world, knowing right from wrong, would I choose behavior that destroys my energy and enthusiasm for life? I'm still working it out, but I think the answer has a lot to do with acceptance and knowing how to ask the right questions in times of need. Poor planning, bad news, poor sleep, stress and heat waves will happen. How do I keep the day to day stuff from affecting my ability to by a happy man?

The equalizer for me has always been fuel and movement. F & M baby! If it weren't for a healthy lifestyle I'd be in a home for sad and depressed guys. My healthy plan for this life has created many more good days than bad. Research shows that we are what we eat and do, not what we think and feel. Eating and doing causes thoughts and feelings...most of the time. The basics are simple - right choices create the E & E to be happy and healthy. The wrong choices (poor diet, no exercise, etc.) cause fatigue, bad moods, stress, illness and a total mind, body, spirit malfunction. Yikes!

2 comments:

psalm9567 said...

Hi Tony,

I needed this post. I am trying to get my E & E back on track. Thanks for what you said to me in your chat last week. I appreciated it very much.

I have been living on interrupted sleep for a month now and have just started to sleep through the night again. Workouts aren't consistent just yet, but they are getting better! I feel myself not being as productive, certainly not as energetic, when I don't work out. My 6:30 a.m. workouts have been such a part of my existence for the last year that I feel a little "lost" without them! So, I'm getting back into them slowly...baby steps, so to speak.

So, the E&E will return! Thanks for posting this...

Sarah/psalm9567

Anonymous said...

Oh the memories! Great recap Hazel girl. You are a rock star and I hope we stay in touch cause you are very smart and funny and I loved laughing with you (even when we were bagging on the great one hehehe). When I finish my round of the x this time I hope I begin to be as strong and well defined as you are! AlfaSunshine AKA Lauren.